FROM THE DESK:
Chief Umbongo Tealeaf
ATTENTION!
Allow me to introduce myself, I Umbongo Tealeaf ROYAL PRINCE of LIDL ALDI a province of JISK and wish to distribute my WEALTH. I have a golden goat and love you very much and want to marry you. I prayed over it and selected your name among other names due to its esteeming nature and the recommendations given to me as a reputable and trust worthy person that I can do business with and by the recommendation , I must not hesitate to confide in you for this simple and sincere business. The financial statement of my bank is US$92,000,000.02 and the current assets of my bank is liquid resources, cash, inventories, CASH and cash. I am Umbongo Tealeaf and have been managed to ask a RELIABLE foreigner to OVERSEE our funds whilst we TRANSFER or golden goat to our partners. We are trustworthy, only yesterday did we transfer US$45,000,000.03 to your friends, proof we are TRUSTWORTHY, I trust you.
We have agreed to share the fund as follows :
90% WILL BE GIVING TO YOU HAS THE OWNER OF THE ACCOUNT WHERE THE FUND WILL BE TRANSFER AND 70% WILL BE FOR ME AND 40% FOR VALUE ADDED TAX THAT WILL BE REQUIRED BY YOUR BANK OFFICIAL.
Please send urgent following information.
1. Name
2. Shoe size
3. Pets last name
4. Driving licence and passport
5. Your wife
THE BANK WILL SEND YOU VALID CONCRETE AUTHORIZATION DOCUMENT AND TELEX CONFIRMATION WILL BE SEND TO YOUR BANK AND FOR YOU TO VARIFY FROM YOUR BANK AS SOON AS THE FUND HIT YOUR BANK ACCOUNT. THE GOAT WILL ARRIVE BY DELIVERY AND COMES WITH HAY.
NOTE: Please kindly state your early response immediately for more details on the modalities involves and this business is for your eye only and it is top secret you have to keep strictly confidential.
I WILL BE EXPRECTING YOUR URGENT COMPLIANCE AND FEED BACK.
YOURS TRULY,
DR. Monica Umbongo
E MAIL:umbongoumbongotheydrinkitinthecongo.hottymail.con
If your wondering why I have just typed the above its all down to an unsolicited email Foreverbunny received this morning from a british company, basically it was offering a service that was completely misguided and cheekily added "Don't want to hear from us? Unsubscribe here". I'm sorry, I didn't subscribe in the first place and now your asking me to waste my time unsubscribing from you? Spam as always been part of the internet, the assumption of an automatic subscription to further emails is a little too much. Anyway as I was in a funny mood I typed a reply and mailed it back using their contact form...
"Thank you for your email that appeared in my Foreverbunny mailbox this morning and thank you for offering the option for me to unsubscribe from your email service and not to receive any more unsolicited emails after never opting for it in the first place.
Yes I do not want a *****, yes I do not want spam like this I have to unsubscribe from.
At least your Facebook page is full of useful items like Fall Prevention Systems, PPI reclaiming, Business Electricity prices and of course places to eat Italian Food, I shall book mark it should I require some kind of random service in the future or are in dire need of a commode with bicycle attachment. Poop as you peddle I'd call it if I was you, you'll get lots more hits.
I also noticed your profile picture is full of smiling happy people, I can only assume they have received your delightful e-mail too this morning and are thrilled that they have to waste their time unsubscribing. Indeed I had to be restrained from taking part in this entertaining pass time and I applaud you on your innovation and technical expertise in offering me this opportunity, it's emails like this that make me leap out of bed in a morning.
Congratulations also for appearing on Email Report, http://www.email-report.com/**************, you must be so proud. I have tried to get on the list many times but my emails regarding our patented Butt Enlarger the Heavyass fails to make an impression.
Kindly remove me from your made up list and free me of the need to do it myself.
Foreverbunny
www.foreverbunny.co.uk"
Ahhh, that's better, hope they find my email more amusing than theirs, thinking about it I wonder if they are interested in Viagra or my new Penis Enlarger business? I'll send them an email to find out!
www.petersmithcollective.co.uk Home Of Foreverbunny and the Impossimals
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