Facephore

With the latest announcement that Facebook is going to charge users to up to £10 to contact people not on their friend list they are giving users an additional option at no extra charge. They are introducing Facephore, the popular flag based signalling method bought right up to date for today's fast paced world. Here's a brief run down of the most popular Facephore statuses being launched soon...

Hi, I'm single and possibly weird, I'm not giving anything away in my photo although I may be mentally unstable.

Married, together we fly the flag of togetherness until we argue and then we try to stick the dam flag up each others backside.

Its complicated. Its that complicated that I don't even know where to start apart from the fact that seven Peruvian pygmy goats and that fellow from across the road had nothing to do with it.

I'm at work, sucks doesn't it.

I have kids and its awful. Why did they not tell me that they do random stuff, shout, squeal, run around, be petulant and make a mess?

It's my birthday folks, I'm going to celebrate I'm getting closer to incontinence.

I'm drunk, too drunk to even wave this dam flag.

I need a poo but I can't go.

Yay! I did a poo and it was grand!

I have a new hat.

I own a cat, although owning a cat is like saying I own a small Caribbean island. Its all in your head and cats only rub up against you to get rid of their static build up. If they didn't do that their hair would stand on end and they would be prone to starting electrical fires.