Friday, November 21, 2014

Lady Gaga's Baublemoose's Spam Box

Hi, I'm well known singer Lady Gaga Baublemoose and my box is stuffed, full to the brim, tightly packed and it's getting fuller by the day so I thought I would share a few with you from my extensive and roomy spam box.

As you can see, I'm incredibly rich...

UNITED NATIONS DEVELOPMENT PROGRAMME
UN FOUNDATION SCHEME 2014

This is to notify you that you have been appointed as one of the recipients of a Cash Grant/Donation for your personal and community development. You were selected among the beneficiaries to receive the sum of GBP 6,500,000.00as developmental aid from the UN Foundation. Contact UNDP Secretary-Mrs. Patricia OBrien. You will be required to proceed with the acquisition of the “Release Approval Document” which has been subsidized to US$390.

I have instructed them to take the $390 out of the GBP 6,500,000 and forward me the change but I know what I am going to spend it on as some nice person sent me several links to the winning lottery numbers this week, they absolutely GUARANTEE it and I know it's genuine as they used Brian Blessed speak, i.e. SHOUTY CAPITALS, in fact Brian Blessed is the human version of CAPS-LOCK. Just think of it, the line GORDON'S ALIVE! would have been such a let down if it was simply Gordon's alive. It's like a disappointment isn't it? Gordon's alive? What have we got to do to get rid of that stupid muscled moronic and extremely annoying football player with the crap hair? Send war rocket Ajax to bring back his body.

Where was I, ah...

3 words that make her horney, The trick is 100% rejection proof..... And it's compltely undetectable. Which means you'll never get "caught" using this... And you'll never get shot-down or embaressed.

Well sonny, you have really EMBARRASSED yourself there haven't you?  Spelling not a strong point or were you too busy 'not getting caught' with your three word hornathon? Thank's for the tip Austin Powers I think I will pass on that.

Another e-mail?

Your bedroom is about to become a zoo My husband grew 3 inches and now I brag about him like never before!

Actually I think its a circus or sideshow you are after, any three inch gentleman would surely be better suited on display for the paying public. You could make him live in a dolls house for example, or make a boat out of a margarine tub, the fun could literally be endless.

Monday i was a size 40 - Today I'm a 35, My name is Sarah - we met once before, but I dropped over 20lbs in under one week. 

Wow, well done Sarah, I can't quite recollect you but its fantastic you have managed to reverse the ageing process and returned back to your thirties. Please tell me your secret! I once dropped over 20lbs in one day with a giraffe that was SO big I bet they got it at the sewerage plant before I had finished with it.

Challenge yourself - Be and Adventurer by choosing from our universal library of cool plans for any skill level.

"My kids asked Santa for this gift and were jumping for joy when they opened it under the tree".
- Andrea from Colorado

Every plan is detailed so you never miss a step. The instructions are colorful and easy to follow.

An email selling plans? What type of plans? Evil plans? One to build a frikkin' laser? How do you open a plan under a tree exactly and how do you wrap a plan that is essentially a wrapper in itself? You say it's colourful but HOW colourful? I have so many questions please furnish me with more details regarding your unique unknown plans.

His erection gave me goosebumps, all I did was give him these common items from my house and he got erect for the whole weekend.

How novel, buildings can be so interesting. Could you please send me further details of your excellent builder, he sounds amazing that he can erect anything from household items. Can you ask him what he can do with a toilet brush, several cumquat's and a small Henry Hoover?

Ave, ave my friend
I am proud of everything i achieved but I think that everything
the best in my future including meeting a person I will be happy with
 I want to find a man to share my life with, to have mutual sex interests and help him in everything.
Hope we can connect soon

Ave

Stan Dolly

I don't know what to say, Stan Dolly is a most unusual name and I am intrigued, please send me your details and a photo so we can connect soon. Here's mine...


Ave Mon Amie! Avec a vous a don a diddle I doh! Xxx

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