Saturday, June 30, 2012

Chip Cannon Ball

Pasta with chips and cheese sauce, one of the latest offerings from the takeaway menus that have dropped through our door recently. I really believe that we live in possibly the most chip hungry place in the UK judging by the menus, I mean, chips with pasta - really?

So without further ado lets look at some of the other mouthwatering food available at the end of my telephone should I feel like a massive intake of carbohydrates and fat.

For starters I was seriously tempted with the Round The House pizza, a tempting combination of Ham, pepperoni, salami, chicken, bacon, chilli beef, prawns and tuna with a healthy splash of green peppers and black olives unsurprisingly with a side order of chips. Hang on, what's that I spy under the vegetable extra toppings? it's butter, seriously, it's butter listed as an extra veg topping. Love to see the cow that came from.

Ah, another menu, let's see what I fancy here. Hmmm, the burgers sound nice, especially the 3/4 pounder and especially the Doner Bolo, skilfully created to mash together two cuisines this whopper brings doner kebab meat and chilli bolognese sauce into one mouthwatering £5 meal that will keep you on the throne for weeks especially as it comes with chips.

But maybe I'm more partial to something a little more slimming, maybe a light chicken wrap for example. Ah, here's one, a chicken wrap served with salad. Hang on, what's that underneath? Smothered in garlic butter and served with chips and grilled cheese. Just the thing to make that chicken slip down nicely.

Jacket potatoes, theres an idea. Hmm, with butter, with butter and cheese, with butter and mayo, with beans and cheese, with cheesy coleslaw all served with a side order unsurprisingly of chips. Its the food worlds equivelent of double denim.

I need to seek solace and find something from out of these four menus that I wouldn't feel bad about eating, how's about the kids meals? All served with chips apparently and proudly listed on all the menus.


So, seeing as I have just invested in a large potato field and bought a brand new chipper for my new business Chipalotalonga may I suggest that chips become obligatory for every meal and is written into the new constitution.

Fancy a breakfast of cereal and juice? Well it's not complete without some cheesy chips, dunk them in your yoghurt for a taste sensation your mouth won't believe.

Brighten up your trifles with a selection of chips to replace the spongy ladies fingers you use. Imagine the delight and surprise as your guest tuck in to jelly and chips, the fun never ends with this new 'chelly' combo.

Smear salmon sandwich spread on individual chips to create instant 'fish sticks', roll them in breadcrumbs and deep fat fry them again to get not only a twice cooked gorgeous chip but also a makeshift fish finger too, the possibilities are endless.

For the ultimate chipfest though make a Chip Cannon Ball, basically get a 1lb of minced beef, add a 1lb of cheese to bind it and roll it in a ball. Get 5lb of chips, dip them in egg to help the binding process and roll your beef and cheese ball through them until they coat the ball completely. Smother in butter and roll your new head sized snack in breadcrumbs. Using an industrial fryer cook until crispy, drain and serve with cheese, mayo and chips for that ultimate late night light bite.

N.B. Recipie untried, quantities are adequate for one small drunken snack or alternatively donate your chip cannon ball to a family so they can eat for a month. Chip Cannon Balls are only one of the untried tasty recipes available at Chipalotalonga under their 'Cook a Coronary' speciality menu. Try the sumptuous Chicken Chip Gobbler or Beef Basketball from our house special and receive the bonus recepie Chocolate Chip Dippers absolutely free.

I'm off to chip some chips. Happy chipping and remember if it's a chip it's got to be a Chipalotalonga chip!

Hmmm, I wonder what's for tea?

It's chips! yippee!!!!

Today's chiptastic blog has been bought to you by the Chipalotalonga marketing board, chipping chips since 1642.

No comments: